My mother has six children, three girls and three boys. I believe it can't get better than this, my studies of Accounting has always taught me about the important of balance. What I find very amazing about my siblings is that they are extremely unique, be it physical, intellectual, religious, academic and in any sphere of one's life. It's very difficult for an outsider to identify my family member based on what they do or how they look like. Despite all my 'differences', we do get along very well. I guess it's just easy to get along with those that one shares the struggles with me, those who represent your everyday reality. Our struggles have brought us together, and now we know that we are the only ones that take ourselves out of our poverty. My motivation has always been to help my family, I want to be in a position in which I can just help them but help them to help themselves.
My sister Phumudzo was the one that used to inspire me to do well at school. She never repeated a grade until she reached grade 11, where she had a kid as a teenager. I used to watch her waking up very early in the morning to prepare for her school day at Ndaedzo, the high school in which I became the top learner in my matric year. My daily walk to Ndaedzo was never easy but knowing that my sister has trodden the path before me was comforting. I believe she could have ended up as somebody in life, had it not been for the child she had. All these just remind me of the fact that talent alone can never be enough, there always need to be discipline to supplement it if someone is to unleash their full potential. She's now a caring mother to her two sons and my kids would be fortunate to one day call her 'auntie'. I believe she can still achieve great things in her life, it's just a matter of chance being presented to her.
I have an older brother that I'm just not close to. We have no grudges or something, we just happened to be friends. We never really talk but we share a room. It's really awkward when we are together. I guess it's because we didn't grow up together. He stayed with my uncle at the other side of the village, because our house didn't have enough space to accommodate him. After a boy has gone to the circumcision school, he is culturally not allowed to share a room with the females. We lived in a one-roomed house, so there was literally no space. I have heard from some people that he is so proud of me( it's not like I expect him to say it to my face though). It's understandable given the environment in which I grew up, where you don't tell people that you love them, you show them that you love them. He's quite a nice person and I have nothing against him. He has been through a lot in his life. I am glad things are working out for him now that he has a job.
My mother is the one that has always been there for me. She just doesn't have much but she tries. Her support through through my primary and secondary school has been amazing, she has always maintained a good relations with my teachers. I'm sure she wishes she could do for me what other women in the village has done for me but I'm so grateful for her support. My life mission is to make her proud. Words could not describe the joy and pride that she had the day I passed matric. She was not settled when I had to leave for Cape Town, I was the first one in the family to have ever left home at such a young age( but I was 19 mom). She's now fine with it, but she says I don't keep in touch as much as I have to. That's just how mothers are(they can't let go), to them we'll always be the little ones they gave birth to. With the number of grandchildren she has, she always the centre of attention. Kids always want to play with their Makhulu.
I always say that one thing I miss the most when I'm in Cape Town is kids. We always had them when I was growing up, from my younger brother to my sisters' children. Not that I enjoyed playing with them, they are simply a bundle of joy( any African family knows that). It's just priceless to watch them grow. I only see children on Sabbaths when I go to church. I feel I'm missing out on my nephews' lives now that I'm in Cape Town. People would jokingly say my home is a creche, based on the number of children we always have. Children are truly a gift from God, I've seen how easy it is to accept them, no matter how they came into the world. Being with them helps me to realize this fact of life: little things matter.
What I love about my family is that you are never forced to do or to be something, we all have been given a chance to choose what we feel is best for us. No one can point a finger at others for their failures. We were allowed to do what we wanted, as long as we will be ready to suffer the consequences. The problem with freedom of choice has always been that people do not know what's best for themselves. The good thing about freedom of choice is that you learn to be responsible( remember you are the only one to blame should things go wrong).
I've seen how far we have come as a family,when we were told we would never count for something, to where we are now. We have been lucky not to have lost any member of our family( except for our father who didn't stay with us anyway). We have sometimes been scattered but all those who have left have always known that they have a home at Manamani. One day the sun shall shine upon us and we shall smile.Family Over Everything
